Wednesday, August 16, 2006

an upbeat attitude?

I received a compliment this morning that I don't know that I deserve, but sure made me feel good to get.  A friend posted on my blog that I had kept an upbeat attitude throughout my pregnancy.  I have TRIED.    Yet, I haven't experienced a lot of the woes that most pregnant women experience, either.  Morning sickness never stepped foot in our house, nor did midnight cravings.  Even the frequent trips to the bathroom haven't really occurred--I guess because I'm used to having to go all the time anyway!!  Now, I"m sure Geron could point out times that I have not been upbeat---like my psycho chic visits or my poor nights of sleep---but I HAVE tried to stay positive. 
I think something that hit me this morning was what a blessing I have truly received.  I don't know if I'll ever realize what God is doing in our lives by trusting this baby to us.  I have some friends who want DESPERATELY to have babies and haven't been able to thus far.  AND PLEASE DON'T HEAR ME SAY THAT GOD DOESN'T WANT THEM TO HAVE CHILDREN.   I have no idea what His plan is for them, but I know they would all make INCREDIBLE parents!  Its very humbling to realize how easy this has been for us when they are having such a difficult time.  I want to be careful to be thankful for this little girl every day and for the priviledge to have carried her.  Yes, there have been a few moments where I want to say "GET HER OUT!"  and there, I'm sure, will be moments when I want to say "PUT HER BACK IN!"  but I never want to take her for granted nor be less than the best Mom I can be to her.  


Anonymous said...

You guys are going to be awesome parents. One thing to remember when baby girl gets here - sometimes it's okay to let them cry. I'm not saying to leave her in her crib all the time and let her howl. But what I'm saying is, you don't have to rush to pick her up and cuddle her immediately as soon as she starts whimpering. And if there are times when (and there probably will be) you're exhausted, and the baby has been crying for what seems like forever but you can't figure out what's wrong - she has a clean diaper, she isn't hungry, her clothes aren't too tight, she isn't too hot or too cold - but she keeps crying anyway... well, it's okay to put her in her crib, walk out of the room, shut the door and take a time out for yourself. If you're frazzled and stretched to the end of your rope, it's okay to take five minutes out for yourself. Otherwise, in your desperation and frustration, you might do something you'll regret later. This is the voice of experience talking here. It is okay to put yourself before baby sometimes. It's really hard to do, and we're programmed from the minute we're born to take care of everyone else first, but sometimes, YOU HAVE TO COME FIRST, otherwise you'll do nothing but harm to those around you. So take a step back, let the little one cry a little bit, take some time out and talk to God. He'll help calm you down and see you through. Take a few minutes to get yourself back. Because when you're exhausted from the baby (and you will be sometimes, ask Suze, your mom, Jenn, Julie, etc. Heck, even ask Anne Lamott) that Psycho Chick that visited you during pregnancy will come back, and she'll be worse than ever.

heather honaker said...

i know how those friends of your feel that desperately want to have a baby. i was there. we had problem. then i had a miscarriage about a year and a half later. that pregnancy wasn't planned. so we decided that maybe it was time to try again. so we tried. and tried. and tried. for 3 and a half years. with no luck. we wondered if God wanted us to have another child. we really desperatey wanted one. but you know what? He gave us one...when HE wanted to. He knew what was best for us, and He had a plan for us that we just couldn't see. and now i'm so thankful that we've had to wait this long and try so long. i can see His plan coming together and now it all makes so much sense! God DOES know what He's doing!

by the way...this little girl is so lucky to have you and geron as her mom and dad. :)

love you guys!

ps..and you're right! it is easy to keep a better attitude when you don't have all the "negative" symptoms of pregnancy!

Tooz said...

Folks that know you know that you have almost always had an upbeat attitude, even when you really worked to show it. You have been blessed, but you are blessing others, too, more than you know. Love you.